Today I have a couple of self discovery type exercises I want to share with you. If you enjoy writing and are used to keeping journals or free writing, this will be a cinch and you’ll likely receive some kind of clarity immediately.
Should you be unfamiliar with the concept of free writing, this may well be an excellent opportunity for you to try it out and see if it could become a method of personal exploration for you.
I would define free writing as your stream of consciousness transcribed into the written word. There is only one requirement and that is that you allow yourself to describe, without any judgement at all, exactly what is in your mind, often without stopping, until of course you have finished. Some people may time themselves when free writing i.e. they choose to free write for 10 minutes and then stop.
Personally, I have developed my own style and it usually begins with a question I have for myself (or for the World/humanity) and then the writing begins and ends when the momentum stops.
I first came across the concept of free writing as a therapeutic tool when I read “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron. It’s a great book if you haven’t already read it. Her observations and exercises can relate to all of us, as we’re all naturally creative beings. I found it to be (as a resource) a great confidence builder and significant for this journey of self discovery I am on.
I seem to go through periods of seeking, reflection and integration. Presently I am seeking with a sprinkling of self-reflection thrown in. It is Winter after all, definitely a time for rest and re-evaluation in preparation for the bursts of Spring! So I have begun an online writing course developed by Catherine Ann Jones called “Heal Yourself with Writing”. I hadn’t actually realised it was entitled that until now…seems a tall order don’t you think? It sounds like these Life Hacks that are trendy at the moment, I’m surprised it wasn’t marketed more like “10 steps to Healing Yourself through Writing” or “Get Healed in 10” Anyway I digress… so I thought to share two of the writing exercises I have completed, here with you (It’s actually a worthwhile course). They’ll have my own spin on them as I have my own way of delivering information.
So let’s kick off by taking a look at this quote, read it out loud if you want to just to help you to hear the words.
“The intolerable image is the transformational image”
– Wallace Stevens (Poet)
How do you feel about what has just been said? Can you relate in any way to this statement? Is this true for you? There is no right or wrong answer here. However you feel and however you answer is an absolutely perfect reflection of You.
For me this conjures up the idea of being fearless in facing that which seems/feels intolerable and consequently transforming the self and/or circumstances to reflect something better, something healthy, something good.
A useful example of perceiving the intolerable as transformational comes from the guy who founded the organisation Charity:Water. He set up this charity with a mission to provide our global population with clean drinking water. This was after witnessing intolerable sanitation and health conditions of the people living in Liberia, Africa. Coupled with his own challenging experiences within childhood and young adulthood, which seemed to give him the strength, drive and determination to see his vision for our World to be made manifest.
If you are interested in listening to his story, I’ll pop the link here:
Part one
So let’s have a go at accessing our intolerable aspects of the self. You will likely have heard this described as the Shadow aspect or the Ego self. It’s all the same just with different labels. The purpose of openly and willingly accessing this part of the self is for integration. The duality of dark and light represents separation and it is the unification of the two that brings about harmony, balance and ultimately will bring us closer to our True self. And its through Love in the form of self compassion, acceptance and grace that we unify the two.
There are two parts to this exercise. Part one is the free writing, allowing the shadow to be brought into the light and the acceptance and integration aspect of the exercise.
So get your self quiet, with your pen and paper and consider an archetype or animal that represents your shadow. You can make a note of this image. How does this image feel to you? What qualities does it possess?
The purpose of this is to create a symbol that has a resonance. This resonance will unlock the ‘secret door’ to your subconscious and allow your darkest thoughts to flow.
Now write the following on the top of the page:
“What is the dark shadow of my Soul?”
Let me just remind you of what free writing is: –
“I would define free writing as your stream of consciousness transcribed into the written word. There is only one requirement and that is that you allow yourself to describe, without any judgement at all, exactly what is in your mind, often without stopping, until of course you have finished.”
Please be mindful; that this is not an exercise in being right, simply transcribe exactly what is in your mind.
Please also note that after you have finished, take a few breaths, just to ground yourself. Also, and this important too: There is no need to re-read the words at this time, as this could lead you to make judgements and that would be counter-productive at this stage.
OK, so now you are ready to begin writing; simply start and allow the resonance of the symbolic character to open up your consciousness…allow the words to flow freely….
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OK great. Just spend a few moments to feel into the space you have created for yourself. Allow yourself to feel into any emotions, identify the emotions if you want to but do not start diving into the ‘story’ or ‘narrative’ that the mind attaches to the emotion. If the ‘story’ starts to make an appearance, simply state: “I have no interest in this” and allow it to dissolve…
Now write the following statement down and read it to yourself out loud if possible, perhaps a few times, to allow the message to be heard:
“I accept this part of myself without judgement. Though I choose to stand in the light, I will listen to the voice of my shadow and learn how to Love it all”
Again sit quietly for a few minutes, allow this new way of being to percolate into your heart space. Really feel into the loving embrace that you have created for yourself, through the acknowledgement and acceptance of the many ‘shadow’ ideas and beliefs you have been holding and keeping secret…for so long!!!
Feels good!
As a little tip, anytime you do free writing and it has a feeling of shadow about it, use the above statement. It will assist you with moving beyond the feelings and help with integration.
Part two
For balance it would be useful for you to connect with your light and for you to connect with your newly integrated Soul (which has always been integrated but you have not perceived it as so).
So sit quietly again, take some deep breaths in and exhale well, emptying the lung space. Perhaps sighing “ahhhhh” – this can be a very helpful way of releasing tension.
If you have the feel to, you could place your hand onto your heart area, this can bring about peace and steadiness. When you have connected to that quiet space within ask yourself: “What would be a metaphor for my Soul?” Again, this could be an archetype, an animal or a place. How does this image feel to you? What qualities does it possess?
Get your pen and paper ready to free write after asking the following question:
“What do you want?”
This is a question for your Soul to answer so use the symbolism to assist you in connecting to that source.
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Enjoy the peace and the infinite sense of space that this exercise gives you.
Perhaps you would like to reflect on your experiences today by asking yourself some questions. You may like to enquire: How did I feel being so close and personal with my hidden side? How did it feel to be able to acknowledge and accept my shadow? What did integration feel like? What was difficult, if anything at all?
Enjoy the freedom that comes with this experience, when the cerebral is connected to the heart. I wonder too what messages you received from yourself during this exercise and how you see them begin to manifest within your day-to-day now. And should your shadow appear in your day, perhaps you will confidently and lovingly say “I accept this part of myself without judgement. Though I choose to stand in the light, I will listen to the voice of my shadow and learn to Love it all”.
If you want to share feel free to leave a comment, we’d all be happy to hear from you.
So much love for you xxx
Anya Ward 